Theraverse
.
April 23, 2025
On the days when the going gets hard, one thing I always remind myself is that I’m living my 16-year-old’s “Best Case Scenario”. And this statement pushes me more than any motivational playlist or incentivised to-do list out there. Knowing that my todays were once, just a dream for the little girl in me, makes all the difference in how I approach my tomorrows!
Inner child work in therapy can at first sound a bit too playful, ineffective or even irrelevant if you are someone who believes that the ‘past is in the past’. As much as we would all love for that to be true, it’s not the case.
And these influences of the past can show up in ways we may not predict, like someone from workplace that you just don’t seem to take a liking towards and later realising the power dynamic you feel with them reminds you of your father, so the dislike might be displaced by the daughter in you. Or getting overwhelmed with tears of joy for a haircut, not understanding why you are having such a disproportionate reaction, then realising how you were never allowed to look the way you wanted to as a child and the haircut represents a new found sense of freedom and agency as an adult.
Why is it important?
When we don’t heal our inner child or ignore the hold it has on us, it would be like continuing to work for the same boss after quitting the company. We may be driven by our child’s impulses and needs for gratification. And not knowing why we feel the way we do can make us emotionally dysregulated all the time, leaving us confused, lost and stuck in unhealthy patterns where our thoughts and emotions get the better of us. Whereas processing the inner child’s needs, burdens, asks and patterns could help us get to the root of the problems instead of the grown-up meltdowns that meet the eye.
If you are thinking that all of this seems like a bit of a stretch, let me help you with the science behind it to further concretize this concept!
- Usage of epigenetics to influence gene expression
While your genes provide the blueprint, it’s your environment and experiences that influence which genes are turned “on” or “off” and this is the field of epigenetics that inner child healing taps into.
When children grow up in environments filled with emotional neglect, criticism, or trauma, it can epigenetically prime them for heightened stress sensitivity, anxiety, or emotional dysregulation.
This can be reversed through consistent emotional safety, nurturing experiences, and inner re-parenting work, as the brain and body can begin to down-regulate stress responses and promote healing. Inner child work isn’t resetting your DNA but it is sending your body the message “we are safe now.” And that can change everything.
- Memory reconsolidation to re-write the past
Memory isn’t a static file folder, it’s more like a Google Doc. Every time we recall an emotional memory, we open it, and in the right emotional context, we can edit it before the brain stores it again. This is called memory reconsolidation, and it’s one of the most powerful processes in trauma healing.
When clients engage in inner child work, especially when they revisit painful childhood moments with new emotional resources (like imagining their adult self, comforting their younger self), they’re not just “remembering” but they are changing how that memory is stored in the brain.
This doesn’t erase the past, but it alters the emotional charge of the memory. Over time, the brain updates its threat response, “That happened, but I’m no longer in danger.” This is what allows for real change in patterns like hypervigilance, emotional triggers, and deep-seated fear or shame.
- New beliefs, new neural pathways!
Every time you think a thought, react in a certain way, or avoid a certain feeling, you’re reinforcing a neural pathway. Many of our automatic beliefs like “I’m not safe,” “I don’t matter,” or “I have to be perfect” were formed in childhood, often in response to unmet needs or trauma.
Inner child healing helps clients see those beliefs not as the absolute truth, but as meaning made by a younger self trying to survive. From there, therapy helps to introduce new beliefs, like “I can be loved as I am” or “My needs are valid” and then practice them through journaling, visualization, boundary-setting, and self-compassion.
Each repetition of a new belief is like building a new mental trail. Eventually, the brain starts to favor this newer, healthier path over the old one. This is called neuroplasticity which is your brain’s ability to change, adapt, and rewire itself throughout life.
Helpful tools,
(Inner child work can be overwhelming to do by yourself without proper guidance and support, so working with a mental health professional is advised.)
.
By,
Jensita Grace,
In-house Psychologist, Theraverse
.
https://i-scholar.in/index.php/ijhw/article/viewFile/49460/40464
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sIeNp0g_bXVu86yWEwuI5mrlmDEeMpWb/view
https://drive.google.com/file/d/133ehDOQwczKDDSgPHy90WanOlBk22Uoh/view
