Theraverse . April 3, 2024

Dating these days comes with it’s own set of words and phrases that describe the relationship. Terms like “ghosting” or “breadcrumbing” have sprung up, especially among younger folks. This article looks into how the new terms of the dating lexicon, impact the mental health of young people and shape the way they connect with others in today’s world.

Benching: Benching refers to keeping someone on the sidelines as an option because you’re not ready to commit or don’t feel strongly enough about them to make things official. Benching has significant negative impact on people’s mental health because being benched means someone is kept on the sidelines as a backup while the other person explores their potential options. This can lead to feelings of insecurity, low self-worth, anxiety and low self-esteem, it may also cause trust issues leading to questioning their own judgment and instincts, wondering if they are somehow to be blamed for being benched. Even the person who is benching can go through ambiguity and eventually feel incriminated for playing with the emotional availability of the partners involved.

Breadcrumbing: Breadcrumbing is a term often used in dating and relationship, referring to the practice of sending intermittent or sporadic messages to someone with no real intention of committing or progressing the relationship. In simple terms it’s leaving breadcrumbs or providing just enough to keep someone interested without fully engaging or committing to them. It can be frustrating for the person on the receiving end, as it creates uncertainty about intentions. Some researchers suggested that the breadcrumbed people tend to feel lonelier, more helpless, and less satisfied with life. The prolonged nature of the process makes it particularly difficult, perhaps more so than ghosting the person.

Gaslighting: Gaslighting in a relationship is a manipulative tactic where one partner seeks to undermine the other’s sense of reality, often by denying their experiences, emotions or perceptions. This can manifest through tactics such as denying past events or statements, trivializing the victim’s feelings, projecting their own fault onto the victim or even, withholding information and twisting facts to suit their narrative. Gas lighting causes chronic stress and severe emotional distress, the constant verbal assaults affect self-worth and confidence.

Ghosting: Ghosting is a phenomenon in which someone abruptly cuts off communication with another person, typically in a personal or romantic relationship, without explanation or warning. This can include ignoring messages, calls, and other forms of communication and effectively disappearing from the other person’s life. Ghosting may affect serious mental health problems the sudden disappearance of a person may feel lonely and abandoned. This can lead to trauma, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and trust issues.

Kittenfishing: Kittenfishing is a term used to describe a milder form of catfishing. While catfishing involves creating a completely fake identity online to deceive others, kittenfishing involves  presenting oneself in a slightly exaggerated or misleading way on dating apps or social media. This could include using outdated or highly edited photos, embellishing personal details, or portraying oneself in a way that doesn’t entirely reflect reality. While not as extreme as cat fishing, kitten fishing still involves deception and can lead to disappointment or confusion for those who interact with the person. Kittenfishing  can affect mental health in various ways. It can lead to feelings of inadequacy, distrust, and the constant comparison of oneself to idealized online versions of people can contribute to anxiety, depression, body image issues and other such mental health issues.

Roaching: Roaching is a term used to describe a deceptive behavior where one person hides the fact that they are dating or being intimate with multiple partners simultaneously. This can lead to feeling of betrayal and mistrust when one partner discovers that the other has been involved with multiple people at the same time without their knowledge. Essentially, roaching involves keeping multiple relationships hidden to avoid commitment or accountability. Roaching can be harmful to one’s mental health. Studies show that hook-ups could lead to depression, anxiety, and other negative consequences. According to professionals  “when we see people engaging in roaching or other form of hook-up relationship it is often an indicator that they are also struggling with feelings of loneliness and disconnection”. People being roached may feel trapped, isolated, vulnerable, and stand at the risk of an abusive relationship, and reduced trust between partners.

Situationship: Situationship refers to a romantic or sexual relationship that lack clear boundaries, labels, or commitment. It’s often characterized by ambiguity, uncertainty about the future, and a lack of defined expectations between the individuals involved. While it may involve emotional intimacy and physical connection, it typically falls short of being a fully committed relationship. Situationship can vary widely in terms of intensity, duration, and the level of communication between the parties involved. People in situationships often struggle to understand their partner’s intension and expectations, leaving them with a constant sense of fear and stress, it also leads to feelings of shame and guilt. Moreover situationships cause lack of clarity and commitment which in turn leads to anxiety, uncertainty, insecurity, negative self-image and reduced sense of self worth.

The impact of new dating terms on mental health can vary depending on individual experiences and interpretation. Some people may feel pressured to conform to these terms, leading to stress or anxiety about meeting certain expectations. On the other hand, clear communication facilitated by these terms can enhance understanding and reduce misunderstanding, potentially benefiting mental well-being. However if these terms lead to unrealistic standards or unhealthy behavior, they could contribute to negative outcomes such as low self-esteem or feeling of inadequacy. It’s essential for individuals to prioritize their own mental health and communicate openly with their partners about their needs and boundaries regardless of the nature and label associated with them relationship dynamic.

By Sabitha PV (Intern at Talk Therapy Clinic)